Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Up dated links...

New links and I fix'd Mistress Julie "the HOTest chic on a bike" link enjoy....

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Race Recap or Retread...

Circuit Race: Things you should never do drive 5 hours showed up about 15min.s before the gun. But that’s the way it worked out. I showed up got my number and headed to the line…Bam Racing. The wind was howling at 40 mph steady with guest up to 50. It was like riding in a dust storm. But everybody had to so WTF. It was really strung out with attacks happing one after another. I chased a couple until one broke. Three of us worked well until about five miles to go and this Jack-Off attack off our little group. This slammed one of the guys off which wouldn’t have been too bad. But then he wouldn’t work with me and only having 30 seconds it wasn't going to last. I told the guy the win was his but he wouldn’t pull and we got caught with about a mile to go. Was able to cover the first counter but not the second and out the back I went….23rd

Crit: Tight, flat with monsoon winds again ….The kind of race I live for, until I was put into a curb and endo’d into the grass…not a big deal. A little road rash never hurt anybody. So with a free lap and I’m back in it with bar tape flapping in the wind. I felt good too until my front tire went flat with 3 to go. I must have cut it in the crash. But I was out at that point…..

Road Race: Less wind, but the temp.s where in the low 30’s with rain, snow and ice chunks mixed in…..so no one was motivated to hammer. The first 50 we just pedaled in a big group. Then it heated up, attack after useless attack, but nothing worked. I think people were just getting cold and needed to spin up their legs. I took my turn and cracked it but I didn’t just let up after a sprint off the front and what do you know? Soon there was another guy on my wheel and another bridging. So the next 30min.s we work it that’s until one guy flatted and then there were two. I was just about puking after every pull but stuck to it until we hit the final climb. A little 10 plus 2 mile bruiser and it was nightly night for me. My riding partner rode away and I when backwards. Rolling in 15th….

Uphill TT: They should call it an up mountain TT. I hate TT and I suck as a climber so you know how that went.

So if nothing else I didn’t suck wheel and I put it “All In” every time out. It just didn’t work for me, this time. I did watch a great Pro race and Whitey give this 5280 guy the “LA look” on the last climb to the line for the RR.

Monday, May 29, 2006

The Tour

So, I'm whipped....The weather SUCK'd! Snow, rain and hail. I couldn't pull a race out of my ass, but I got in breaks everyday just could hold them to the line. It was fun to see Whitey pull out the Pro GC.....more on the race later sleep now.

Thursday, May 25, 2006

More dope on dopers...I dont care!

So I took a bunch of hits for my non-stances on doping. I look at like being Gay; I don’t understand it so I just don’t care. If you want to take it up the rear to find love then great or if you feel like you need to stick a .15mm needle in your ass to hit 700 home runs or to ride fast then knock yourself out. In an earlier life I was a gym rat. I loved to lift weights and would hang out in the gym all day. It was amazing how guys would put on 30lb and be ripped in a year when I’d been doing two a days for 10 years to do the same. Did it piss me off? Not really, I always took solaces in the fact I would live past 50 with a full head of hair and a normal size testicular ball sack. I laughed and those meat heads just like I laugh at them now. I don’t under stand it, just like I don’t understand the being gay.
I believe that in sports where athletic ability is needed that most top level “Pro” dope. They have a need to win so badly they’ll die for it…I’ve always though life was more important then that, but if someone wants throw theirs down the toilet to get on the cover of Velo News or Muscle and Fitness I say “GO FOR IT” I’ll enjoy the show. Much like I like watching a dumb chimp smoke a cigarette, it’s all entertaining.

I hope Vino can find a new “Go Fast Dr” for the tour so I can be entertained. Dance Chimp Dance! I love to watch Cycling dope or not……..

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Go fast Dope.....

Want to train like a World Cup MTB'r or Tour rider? You need a "Dr Go Fast" heck you might even need one to get a top ten in a NORBA race. The more I learn about "Being a Pro" the more it makes me laugh! This is how I see it, Local fast guy gets his Cat 1 or Pro Norba card. Races and gets hammered. He or She has two options at that point. One get hammered every race and still be a local “Big Dog” or dope and win. Then if they want to you do a WC or any other Ero-type racing they need even better dope…..You need your own “Dr Go Fast” you can’t just win with your Mex’y internet mail order USA Cat 1 do-it-yourself dope kit. You need to up it a level with your own as seen on TV "Dr Go fast"......

My man Vino had planned to recon the Pyrenean stages of the Tour de France this week, but because his team boss Saiz got pinch with thousand doses of steroids and hormones, along with one hundred packets of blood, and products to manipulate it, machines to freeze it and material to perform transfusions. Mmmmm. "The training camp will probably be cancelled because Saiz (Dr Go fast) is the man that organized everything," said Liberty's PR guy. I guest you can’t train in the Pyreneans as a Ero-pro with out these “MUST HAVE” items…..As the world turns in pro-cycling!

Who's next? Now do I say Doper Suck? Not really…they are just doing what it takes to win. But if I were a clean Pro getting beat by a Doper would I say Doper Suck? YES! I would be piss'd But then again people cheat to win at everything. So let the games begin…I'll be the one laughing.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

So I was wrong

I can admit it…

1st Sandy has a broke Clavicle and Shoulder separation. Surgery forcoming…

2nd Basso dominated today at the Giro. He maybe a Doped Up Gay Boy, but he can ride a bike.
And he’s got a hotter then hot sister…
She’s on the MitchMan and Der’fat boy Hot list! Speaking of Der’Fat boy he mov’n back up the GC list….I'm positive he’ll be back on the good dope by the tour. Plus what happen to Tommy “D” today?

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Shanty Town of Aspen


Aspen is the height of snob even Vail can’t come close. Well the Crit went well, Sandy won her race… I did well also was in a break of three for the first half and then had to let them go. Just did have the wheels to hang with these two guys when they pinned it. So I drop back to the chase group and sprinted for fifth. So I felt good about that. We were both doubling up to get ready for Utah. So Sandy lines up for race two and ended up hitting a girl that went down in front of her. Sending her Cartwheeling. So it was a trip ER for heat two, to take care of some road pizza, separated shoulder and other a sorted bumps and contusions. She tough so I think she'll recover ok…but next weeks stage race is out…
.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

I can't watch it.....

I can't watch the giro anymore...it's just makes me puke. Well I need to put the speed into my bike for the Aspen Crit....out

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Man's man......

So it pays to actually scope out a race course before you go mach-1…..I’ve never been into pre-riding or even talk with people about course terrain. Mostly of the time I just show up. Staying true to form that’s what I did last night….They don’t have a ton of classes so then Big mass starts, Pro, Expert, Sport, Beg. With about 100 strong in each wave. Little did I know there was a 4 Mile road lead-out and return. That’s sucks on “Mr Bigg” …..plus I had a 32x18 on it. So it was a super-spin out to the loop. Needless to say my legs were cooked by the time I hit the dirt. I send the whole race Yo-Yo-ing off the back in my own personal hell. But it was good work and a tight group. I suck all the wheels I could and spun, spun, spun my ass off and suck down 5 pounds of dust. I could see everybody just could close it down with my Climbing gear. Every climb I touch them and boom they be gone. So I was happy finish only 6 mins off the leader.

Hay….Der’Fat boy Lay’d it down today at the Giro. 44 on the GC and move'n on up. Now I'm back on the Jan Band Wagon. He’s going to take down some names at the tour…..

Jan's got WOOD!

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

I've got black lug....

Before After

Well I rolled out "Mr Bigg" at the Vail and it was a dust-bowl to the max! Now I've got the lug!
Sleep Now more on the race later...

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Want to go Pro?

Well you Missed your chance....

More Giro Crap

So do you think stage 17 is where the wheels fall off for Basso? It could be the back breaker…which is ok I’ve never been a Basso fan. He looks a little girly to me. Look at this photo…..he’s got eye liner on and have you every see a guy so unexcited get it from two Hot Honeys? He's Gay! Hands down! Most guys would be stiffer then an old Trek 500.

Pink is his color!

Well I rode up to Vail today and when I say Vail, I mean to the top. They've plowed the road so it’s clear to the top. But man is there the snow. It looks like they could be running the lifts. Tomorrow is the first Vail series MTB race over in Eagle. So I’ve got to wash “Mr Bigg”, oil the chain and I might even check the tire pressure. I'll be doing the kids race!

Monday, May 15, 2006

I'm done......

Der'Fat boy is climbing the GC at the Giro...He's starting to race like me. Start in the middle and work your way back...Well he did win a tour and I've never won crap! So Alex "The Mad Man" Vin is my man in the tour this year.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

I'm the new Trail Boss

Up early today…washed the old Race Wagon and got it ready to sell…

and the New too....

Then, I pull out my WORBA card and put my Junior Park Ranger badge on and did some more trail maintenance.

Strapped an old bow saw to “Mr. Bigg” and set out to take care of a couple downed trees on the Boy Scout trail loop…. Man that loop is so sweet! There’s nothing like a 40 plus mile MTB loop…Couldn’t get all the Trees I’m going to have to pull out some heavy equipment… Chain Saw! I’m not looking forward to that ride. Lugging a 20lb chain saw out 20 miles into the mountains on “Mr. Bigg”… ouch!

Well yesterday was a grunt too…the wind was brutal and the field big. 105 strong in the Cat class. Rang the cash register twice and got pimp’d twice. Missed the break. But bridged on the last lap and had nothing in the tank for the sprint. So I ended up 8th or 9th ….I think, couldn’t wait for the results because the open class was right after. But I was wasted and just sat on wheels and pedaled……Sleep Now.

Kind of a "Big Deal"

Or should I say kind of a "Big Talker"

I was surf'n around this weekend and was reading that the "Big Deal" guy was doing the NORBA National # 1 in Fontana, CA and the Joe Martin Stage Race (road) Fayettville, AK. So I look'd around for his results........none.

So now I'm calling him the "Big Talker"

Friday, May 12, 2006

Bad Moon rising.....

So it was a crazy night........Must have been the moon.


1) Some Chic almost ran me over and told me to fuckoff....

Then it was dodge the animal night
Cows
Sheep
Deer
Elk
Fox



and a ride through the grave yard...


But all is well.....
I'm just finishing up a couple frames for some bro's and then it off to the "Wheels of Thunder" with its Sprint primes every other lap. I'm going for the 1st six and then drop....

Monday, May 08, 2006

I got hit with a 1x9.....

So, it sounds like Mr. Biggs WORS début went well…….Grind it out boys! It sounds like the NORBA championships are going to be in my backyard. Well maybe not my backyard but very close. So maybe I’ll get to make 3 nationals this year. Even though I not much of an MTB’r it’s still fun to race Mr. Bigg every once in a while.
It was a great weekend to do nothing……did exactly as I planned “NOTHING” Ok, I did build a couple frames and rode the Lookout Mountain/Boy Scout loop. The trail is in Great shape. There were about 6 or 7 downed tree that I had to move out of the way. What trail maintenance? Yep and I don’t even have a WORBA or JACKOFF card……I shouldn’t say that to loudly the trail Nazis might come and hammer on me for doing trail work and without going to some dumb Fu&* seminar first! There was a little snow still up high but that should be gone in a day or two…
Well I made a proto-type 29er Shift’r this weekend…I’m calling it the “Mr. Bigg” Switchblade. I’m going to build it up as a 1x9 setup and see how it goes’s……..Still Steel, Still Rigid!

Friday, May 05, 2006

Lazy Dazesssss


I think this is the only weekend all summer I don’t have a race….which is sweet action! I’m just going to build a couple frames, get some sun and hit the trails…….

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Down and Dirty......


There's something great about One Gear, I love to race my Shift'r road bike but when I'm just riding there's nothing like getting on "Mr Bigg" and grinding down the trail. I’ve not put my finger on it yet, is it the b/c it’s quit or the extra effort. I don’t know but it is the shit……So after another espresso I think I’ll go enjoy the simple life…OUT!

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

O----SO----Pro

Well now we know what’s really on the Great Sprinters mind……



I’ve just about given up on “Der Fat Boy”…..Once a slim fast fear man, now the Elvis of the pro tour. Still give respect but no longer a killer.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

On the rack!

In a dark corner of the shop......

Well we got sign up for the Tour of Utah today and the hotel booked.....I can't wait.

Monday, May 01, 2006

Old Scool Racing.....


So yesterday I got home early from the Boulder Beer race that gave me time to work on the Mex’y Car…..I took a little advice from Mike’y and cut the springs to get it really slammed. But I guess I got a little too aggressive with the cut off saw because when I put it back togather it was slammed, but sitting on the bumper stops. I had to take it apart again and cut the bumper stops. I’ll post up some pic after I get it washed…..Which might be later this week. Now that all the Mex’yies are on strike. Which is a great topic around here b/c every other person is an illegal. But it super low now! I’ve also got to take it to the shop and get the suspension realigned. But it’s riding Sweet and Low……I'm so bang'n in it with the Masi on top!

This weekends racing was long, longer and the longest ever….It was an iron man base weekend. Saturday started early with a 9:00am start time (and that’s super early for me. Why do road races have to start so dam early?). I was stoked even with the early start and hoping to make up for last weekends debacle. It was a huge field with 163 starting in the beautiful Colorado spring weather. 30 mile an hour winds, rain with some hale and snow mixed in for fun. So my nice clean bike stayed clean for about the first of the 65 mile race. At about the half way point I did make it into a move (and what would be the winning break) But that wasn’t long for me b/c after bridging up I got a flat. After a wheel change I was in no-mans land for the next 15 min.s until I bridge up again. Feeling gas but happy I just sat in at the break thinking I’ll just coast to the sprint. When the support car pulls up along side of me and the dude yells “I fixed your tire, we need our wheel back” WTF….I was dumb founded but he was adamant about getting he’s wheel back. As I was changing my wheel again I asked if he could pace me back and he agreed so I wasn’t to pissed until my F-n wheel started going flat again as he was pacing my back. So after throw a string of expletives I pack it for the race and headed back to the car limping along on my flat after 40 miles of racing. The women’s group passed me on my way back so I able to yell some support to Sandy as she took it to the woman’s field.

Back at the car stewing about my luck I decided to head over to registration and see what a second race would cost because the cat 1,2’s and the 30plus went off at 1:00 and I thought I would give’r a go, get some more miles in and see how long I can hang. Even thought I had ¾ of a race in already. After fixing my tire and putting a clean kit I headed to the line. In what would turn into an epic race for me with 90 starters….I was amazed at how fast these guy where. For the first 20miles I didn’t get out of my 11 gear it was 35- 37 flat out. Hanging on for dear life I spun my ass off as one guy after another blow off the back. You could see it happen. First his cadence would get choppy then his hands would shake and bam “See Ya” just as it was my turn to go the big teams pulled off the front and the pace slow. Thanks God. Then for the next 40 miles it was Attack, chase, counter attack, chase….It was fun because I think this was the first RR I’ve been in that real team work happen. Even if I did have any teammates it was cool to watch the other work. It seam with every attack and chase our group got smaller and smaller. Amazingly after surviving the first hammer fest I felt pretty good and thought “I can hang with these guy’s”. Which is code for wheel-suck untill the finish. I did move to the front a couple of times but out gun these guys weren’t having any of that. So to the back of the bus I was sent. Not that I had the legs anyway. But the mornings miles took it’s toll and halfway up the largest climb I popped and off the back I went……..then it was my own personal hell for the next 12 miles. My world came crashing down after I lost contact with the leaders. They put like 30 min.s into me in that short 12 miles. So I rounded out the field in 25th…..with 120 miles of racing on my legs I was very happy with that. Sandy had another great showing finishing 5th…..She just needs to learn not to open up the sprint so early.
But the really fun was Sunday, the Boulder Beer race…..it was good for a case a beer! I took the first four sprints for a case and then drop out and went home…..You got to love a case of beer!